“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”
“lest they become discouraged”
The word “discouraged” means to become disheartened and hence lack motivation. This is the only occurrence of this Greek word in the New Testament. One of the reasons for rebellion in some teenagers is that they sustain criticism for most things they have done in life. They have not had much encouragement from their parents.
God wants us to encourage our children. He desires us to praise them for what they do right. Constant criticism will discourage them. They may become disheartened in their attempts to please their parents.
There are two ways to ruin children in a hurry:
1. Some parents make children feel guilty for something they are not doing. That is no way to get your way in anything, much less with our children. Guilt imposition tampers with the soul of the child. Instead of operating on proper norms for life, children will run on ambient guilt feelings. These children will grow up with guilt complexes. It is vital to control children without making them feel guilty.
2. Other parents nag their children for just about everything. They will nag about any little thing…nag, nag, nag. When a big issue comes, the child will not hear the parent because he is dulled by constant nagging. When the big problem comes, the parent has to shout so loud the child cannot hear them. This is especially true with teenagers. “Comb your hair, Susie! Comb…” When the big issue comes, she will not hear her parent. It is the same old stuff. She will not pay her parent any attention. Some parents are natural-born naggers. They lose all effectiveness in parenting.
God’s primary role for the parent is to encourage their children.
Parents, are you encouraging your children?
The Bible doesn’t seem to address the relationship between parents and their ADULT children. They can easily destroy the relationship by exasperating their middle aged children, also. I guess God didn’t anticipate people figuring out how to significantly raise life expectancy to where such issues would pop up. I guess nobody is perfect.
Randall, the primary principle of adult children relationship to their parents is “leaving father and mother.” In other words, the new entity is to stand alone. Other biblical statements about how to build a solid relationship with other adults applies to the situation you indicate.